Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Affirmations

You would never tell a friend she was fat or he was stupid or that they couldn't do something and yet many people spend a majority of their day telling themselves exactly those kinds of things.  We walk around with all this negative self talk clogging up our heads.  If we wouldn't tell our friends those things, then why is it acceptable to say them to ourselves?

It shouldn't be acceptable.  Negative self talk can hold us back in life and keep us from pursuing the kind of life we truly want to lead.

Positive affirmations can turn that around.  It may sound silly, but standing in front of the mirror several times a day and repeating positive affirmations out loud can combat that negative self talk.

Write down 3 to 5 positive affirmations and tape them up on your mirror so that you see them as you get ready for work and bed.  Say them out loud as you look at yourself in the mirror.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

I am smart.

I am kind.

I can be anything I want to be.

I am worthy of love.

What affirmations will you use?  What kind of person could you be without negative self talk clogging up your head?  Serenity Counseling Online wants to know.  Comment on this post on our Facebook page

Saturday, July 13, 2013

If I Loved You

You don't get married expecting to get divorced.  When you are young and in love you can't even imagine the fairytale ending...unless you go into marriage knowing you are marrying the wrong person.  

My first husband is a good person.  He was a good husband.  He would've been a good father.  There was nothing wrong.  

Except that there was.  

I know that he didn't understand what the wrong was.  If I had been a stronger person I would've called off the wedding.  I wasn't at that time in my life.  I knew what a good person he was and I thought that the love would come.  

I went to counseling.  I cried.  I rebelled and basically acted like a teenager.  At 25 years old I wanted to go out with my friends.  I wasn't ready to be married.  He was.  

The more he tried to connect with me, to be the person he thought I wanted, the worse I acted.  I drank too much, I cried too much, I was mean, I hated myself.  

For a long time I blamed myself.  

Delta Rae's song If I Loved You is the music to what I went through and wish I could've voiced during my first marriage.  If I had those words then maybe he would've understood.  

It is better to hurt someone you care about then to spend years with the wrong person.